Welcome to Prufrock Preparatory Academy! Or it would be a genuine and cheerful welcome, if it was being given to anyone else besides the Baudelaire orphans, Violet (Malina Weissman), Klaus (Louis Hynes) and Sunny (Presley Smith).
Then again, why would anyone want to go to a school where the Vice Principle is actually named Nero (Roger Bart) and insists on playing the violin, very badly? The one giving the tour to the flummoxed Baudelaires, Carmelita Spats (Kitana Turnbull), is the cutest girl to ever tap the halls of Prufrock Prep and don’t you ever forget it, cake-sniffer, which of course lets her get away with also being the biggest non-teacher bully in school too.
Mr. Remora (Malcolm Stewart) teaches language arts, though you wouldn’t know it from his real-life anecdotes, and Mrs. Bass (BJ Harrison) teaches math and the metric system, which involves measuring all the random things. The school librarian Olivia Caliban (Sara Rue) does her best to help and educate the students, but is severely hampered with the ‘Library is only open for ten whole minutes each day’ restriction placed upon her by Vice Principle Nero. Larry Your-Waiter (Patrick Breen) has managed to infiltrate Prufrock Prep’s school cafeteria, to try and finally get that damnably important book to the Baudelaire children, which is going about as well as can be expected in Lemony Snicket’s world. And lastly, what about the gym teacher and athletic team we saw in the beginning? Why, that’s the infiltration point made by the dastardly Count Olaf (Neil Patrick Harris) and his gang of miscreant actors!
A Series of Unfortunate Events
This world really does enjoy constantly reminding the Baudelaires that their secretive parents died in a bad fire and they’re now orphans, and the shack they have to live in at Prufrock Prep is a clear example of this. Crabs, fungus, even the warning tapping announcing the coming of Carmelita Spats are no match for the Baudelaire pluck and inventiveness, especially when they have new friends to cheer them on.
The Quagmire children are eerily similar to the Baudelaires, having lost their parents and triplet brother Quigley to death, too. Isadora (Avi Lake) and Duncan (Dylan Kingwell) seem almost tailor-made to be good to Klaus and Violet, respectively, and it turns out Isadora is carrying a telescope very similar to the one Klaus still keeps from the Baudelaire parents. Because, most likely, the Quagmires and the Baudelaire adults knew each-other. It’s a shame they couldn’t prepare for the Prufrock Prep motto, from the Latin, Memento Mori –remember, you will die.
A Series of Unfortunate Events
Why would Vice Principle Nero and the laughable rest of the faculty require everyone to attend a mandatory pep rally? To raise school spirit, of course! Well, not really. To beat the school mascot, a dead horse, of course it is what else would it be, and also to introduce the brand new unqualified gym teacher, Coach Genghis! Boy, he looks familiar. That shiny brooch covering a unibrow used to be on the throat of a certain poppy pink cake-sniffer, and those tall lace-up sneakers can easily cover an ankle tattoo, so at least this time a smidge of effort went into costumery and covering.
Mr. Poe (K. Todd Freeman) is as useless as ever, though you will gain super-secret bonus points if you recognize the book he was reading at the beginning, ‘The Pony Party’! His secretary on the other hand, Jacquelyn (Sarah Canning), after getting a call from Larry Your-Waiter stuck in the freezer after getting found-out, decides to call in for him a super special secret Snicket taxi cab, and driver, for rescue.
Come again to Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events season two on Netflix now, and remember, “In a world too often governed by corruption and arrogance, it can be hard to stay true to one’s literary and philosophical principles.”
If you were born in the ’80s, ’90s, or literally ANY decade after those, you know about Super Mario. A cultural phenomenon was brought to life on the big screen this last weekend. One that has not only stood the test of time but reinvented itself time and time again. This wasn’t even the first time it’s been made into a movie but, well, let’s be honest.. some of us choose not to acknowledge the LIVE action adaptation of the beloved game from 30 years ago.
It was pretty bad… But this was animation. ILLUMINATION animation at that. The Universal company that brought us Gru and his Minions, showed us the Secret Life of Pets, and gave us a reason to SING! Still, I had my reservations and even some concerns, especially when the casting was announced.
Eyebrows were raised. As big of stars as they were on paper, could they really deliver on voicing characters from a staple of our childhood? They did.
Chris Pratt and Charlie Day may not be Italian, and Jack Black may not be a King or Turtle creature from the Mushroom Kingdom, but they make the characters their own all while paying homage to the lore of a video game.
From the jump, the story reintroduces us to the brothers that just want to save Brooklyn one clogged sink at a time. We feel an instant connection and relate to these “underdogs of the plumbing world”. The movie is riddled with easter eggs, each of which tugs on the heartstrings of every generation of Mario fandom. And the soundtrack was beautifully put together to not only make us feel like we’re taking a walkthrough of the game but like an experience all its own with some familiar favorites thrown in.
Every word in the movie is pure eye candy for both those that are casual fans, and those analyzing every frame to see what they’ll catch next. Bowser’s ship, the Mushroom Kingdom, Kong’s arena, and the Rainbow Road.. They’re all meant to give us just enough of a “new” look at these amazing worlds, but stay true to how we remember them.
The movie itself moves along at the perfect pace. Although, if you don’t really know ANYTHING about the Super Mario Bros, you may have gotten a little lost and felt left behind in the green tunnel. But that’s ok! It’s an adventure of the imagination and a classic story of a boy that meets a girl and tries to save the world from a monster that wants to destroy it.
What’s funny is that you could easily say this is a story about two characters who couldn’t be more opposite if they tried, battling to win the heart of a princess. Who would’ve thought that the King of the Koopas was just trying to impress his crush?
And that song? Ohhh THAT song! It’s my new ringtone and deserves the Oscar for Best Original Song.
Back to the movie.
Universal and Illumination clearly understood the assignment. Is it missing some things or could things have been done differently or even better? Absolutely! We’re the worst critics of the things we hold nearest and dearest to our hearts. But if you’re up for going on a 90-minute adventure through amazing worlds, with awesome music, and characters that’ll make you smile and laugh, then this is the perfect movie to spring you into that warm summer feeling.
Plus there’s the whole part with karts and shells, and banana peels and oh my goodness how amazing was that?? It’s enough to make you want to stand up and cheer, then go home and destroy your friends and family on your favorite track haha.
The bottom line, it pays homage in all the right ways to the little guy with the mustache, while giving us something new and exciting. Take the kids and go see Super Mario Bros. You’ll be glad you did!
Justice League x RWBY: Superheroes & Hunters Opening Act Saturday, March 25 at 1:30 p.m. on North 200A. Talent confirmed so far to participate in the post-screening panel is Natalie Alyn Lind (Big Sky, The Goldbergs, Gotham) as Wonder Woman/Diana Prince and longtime RWBY cast member Lindsay Jones (Camp Camp) as Ruby, Kara Eberle ( RWBY: Ice Queendom) as Weiss, Arryn Zech (Detective Now Dead) as Blake and Barbara Dunkelman (Blood Fest) as Yang – along with Jeannie Tirado (Soul, Saints Row) as Green Lantern and Tru Valentino (The Rookie, The Cuphead Show!) as a cyborg. Also attending the panel will be producer/director Kerry Shawcross (series RWBY) and writer Meghan Fitzmartin (Supernatural, Justice Society: World War II).
Warner Bros. Discovery Home Entertainment returns to WonderCon 2023 with the big screen debut from DC Animated Films: highlights this year include the world premieres of the highly anticipated Batman: The Doom That Came To Gotham and Justice League x RWBY: Superheroes & Hunters Part One the weekend of March 24-26 in Anaheim, California. Both screenings will be followed by panel discussions with actors and creators. Batman: The Doom That Came To Gotham premieres at The Arena on Friday, March 24 at 6 p.m. Tati Gabrielle (Kaleidoscope, Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, Uncharted) as Kai Li Cain, Christopher Gorham (The Lincoln Lawyer, Insatiable) as Oliver Queen, David Dastmalchian (Dune, Suicide Squad, Ant-Man) as Grendon, producer/co-director Sam Liu (The Death and the Return of Superman), co-director Christopher Berkeley (Young Justice) and screenwriter Jase Ricci (Teen Titans Go! and DC Super Hero Girls: Mayhem Across the Multiverse).
Both films will have encore screenings in the Arena on Sunday, March 26. Justice League x RWBY: Super Heroes & Huntsmen, Part One will screen at 12:15pm, followed by Batman: The Doom That Came To Gotham at 2:00pm
No Question Mark Box Here; Super Mario Delivers a 1-Up in Theaters
Warner Bros. Discovery Home Entertainment returns to WonderCon 2023
Marvel Studios’ Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3
Crunnchyroll presents ‘BOFURI: I don’t want to get hurt so I’ll max out my defense’: You’re not twinking!
‘Knock at the Cabin’: Puttin on your boogie shoes!
No Question Mark Box Here; Super Mario Delivers a 1-Up in Theaters
Marvel Studios’ Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3
Black Panther: Wakanda Forever
An Askewed View Episode 7 Jay And Silent Bob Reboot
