Reviewed by Alicia Glass
After a mysterious alien artifact lands on earth and all attempts at communication have thus far failed, Captain Niko Breckinridge is tasked with sending the earth spaceship Salvare to discover the point of origin of said artifact!
Normally, everyone would be thrilled to see Starbuck back in action out in space. Except this time, Katee Sackoff is Niko Breckinridge instead of Starbuck, and Niko is rather unpredictable and ruthless. The entire crew of the Salvare seems to live in fear of angering Captain Niko, and apparently with good reason, for when mutiny rears its ugly head in the early days of pre-arrival crisis aboard the ship, Niko responds with merciless, and final, efficiency. She may suffer pangs of guilt after the act, but that doesn’t change the fact that one of her first actions as Captain Niko, was to execute her mutinous second-in-command.
The rest of the crew of the Salvare really doesn’t fare any better, and as they begin to suffer from their Lost in Space –style adventures trying to find the alien artifact homeworld, breakdowns in thinking and order happen and chaos ensues!
It sure doesn’t help that the newly-awoken Cas (Elizabeth Ludlow) was the secret lover of Ian Yerxa (Tyler Hoechlin), the ambitious second who got himself fried in the mutiny attempt by Niko. Or that the ships very own super-sophisticated imprinted AI William (Samuel Anderson) is clearly in love with Captain Niko, and has been in denial about it for some time. The representative of the human government, Sasha Harrison (Jake Abel), ostensibly sent to foster human-whatever relations when they find where the artifact came from, is utterly superfluous and therefore completely useless. Young August, lead engineer of the Salvare, has strange priorities and takes delight in having naked times with shy fellow engineer Oliver (Alex Ozerov) and bold hacker Javier (Alexander Eling), usually at the same time. The crews microbiologist Bernie (A.J. Rivera) has aspirations to be an amateur chef, and doesn’t seem to see anything wrong with including strange newly-found psychotropic plants with the Salvare crews food as a condiment! Zayn Petrossian (JayR Tinaco) is the ships androgynous medic and psychologist, who manages to demonstrate unawares that connection and attraction between persons doesn’t have to be limited to any kind of gender.
Back home on Earth, Niko’s husband Erik Wallace (Justin Chatwin) has been tearing his hair out for months, trying to figure some way of talking to the alien artifact and getting it to respond in some understandable manner. Burdened by his far-too-intelligent daughter Jana (Lina Renna), who’s only interested in when her mother will be coming back to Earth, Erik has to contend with snoopy snarky reporter Harper Glass (Selma Blair) as well, and he’s appropriately beleaguered by all the women in his life. Even after a desperate attempt at alien communication actually works, kind of, Erik is still beset by roadblocks, especially from Egan Harrison (Martin Donovan), Sashas politician father.
The complete lack of discipline evinced by the crew of the Salvare is mildly to be expected, given their never-done-before mission and general humanity in close quarters. But the absurdity that goes on around the freaking alien artifact back on Earth, the severe lack of security and apparent dearth of common sense and decency, combined with the idiocy out in space, make for a poorly-written waste of your TV time. Better pass those psychotropic condiments.
The show has already been confirmed for a Season 2, so here’s hoping the first outing will actually be some lessons learned to carry over!
If you were born in the ’80s, ’90s, or literally ANY decade after those, you know about Super Mario. A cultural phenomenon was brought to life on the big screen this last weekend. One that has not only stood the test of time but reinvented itself time and time again. This wasn’t even the first time it’s been made into a movie but, well, let’s be honest.. some of us choose not to acknowledge the LIVE action adaptation of the beloved game from 30 years ago.
It was pretty bad… But this was animation. ILLUMINATION animation at that. The Universal company that brought us Gru and his Minions, showed us the Secret Life of Pets, and gave us a reason to SING! Still, I had my reservations and even some concerns, especially when the casting was announced.
Eyebrows were raised. As big of stars as they were on paper, could they really deliver on voicing characters from a staple of our childhood? They did.
Chris Pratt and Charlie Day may not be Italian, and Jack Black may not be a King or Turtle creature from the Mushroom Kingdom, but they make the characters their own all while paying homage to the lore of a video game.
From the jump, the story reintroduces us to the brothers that just want to save Brooklyn one clogged sink at a time. We feel an instant connection and relate to these “underdogs of the plumbing world”. The movie is riddled with easter eggs, each of which tugs on the heartstrings of every generation of Mario fandom. And the soundtrack was beautifully put together to not only make us feel like we’re taking a walkthrough of the game but like an experience all its own with some familiar favorites thrown in.
Every word in the movie is pure eye candy for both those that are casual fans, and those analyzing every frame to see what they’ll catch next. Bowser’s ship, the Mushroom Kingdom, Kong’s arena, and the Rainbow Road.. They’re all meant to give us just enough of a “new” look at these amazing worlds, but stay true to how we remember them.
The movie itself moves along at the perfect pace. Although, if you don’t really know ANYTHING about the Super Mario Bros, you may have gotten a little lost and felt left behind in the green tunnel. But that’s ok! It’s an adventure of the imagination and a classic story of a boy that meets a girl and tries to save the world from a monster that wants to destroy it.
What’s funny is that you could easily say this is a story about two characters who couldn’t be more opposite if they tried, battling to win the heart of a princess. Who would’ve thought that the King of the Koopas was just trying to impress his crush?
And that song? Ohhh THAT song! It’s my new ringtone and deserves the Oscar for Best Original Song.
Back to the movie.
Universal and Illumination clearly understood the assignment. Is it missing some things or could things have been done differently or even better? Absolutely! We’re the worst critics of the things we hold nearest and dearest to our hearts. But if you’re up for going on a 90-minute adventure through amazing worlds, with awesome music, and characters that’ll make you smile and laugh, then this is the perfect movie to spring you into that warm summer feeling.
Plus there’s the whole part with karts and shells, and banana peels and oh my goodness how amazing was that?? It’s enough to make you want to stand up and cheer, then go home and destroy your friends and family on your favorite track haha.
The bottom line, it pays homage in all the right ways to the little guy with the mustache, while giving us something new and exciting. Take the kids and go see Super Mario Bros. You’ll be glad you did!
Justice League x RWBY: Superheroes & Hunters Opening Act Saturday, March 25 at 1:30 p.m. on North 200A. Talent confirmed so far to participate in the post-screening panel is Natalie Alyn Lind (Big Sky, The Goldbergs, Gotham) as Wonder Woman/Diana Prince and longtime RWBY cast member Lindsay Jones (Camp Camp) as Ruby, Kara Eberle ( RWBY: Ice Queendom) as Weiss, Arryn Zech (Detective Now Dead) as Blake and Barbara Dunkelman (Blood Fest) as Yang – along with Jeannie Tirado (Soul, Saints Row) as Green Lantern and Tru Valentino (The Rookie, The Cuphead Show!) as a cyborg. Also attending the panel will be producer/director Kerry Shawcross (series RWBY) and writer Meghan Fitzmartin (Supernatural, Justice Society: World War II).
Warner Bros. Discovery Home Entertainment returns to WonderCon 2023 with the big screen debut from DC Animated Films: highlights this year include the world premieres of the highly anticipated Batman: The Doom That Came To Gotham and Justice League x RWBY: Superheroes & Hunters Part One the weekend of March 24-26 in Anaheim, California. Both screenings will be followed by panel discussions with actors and creators. Batman: The Doom That Came To Gotham premieres at The Arena on Friday, March 24 at 6 p.m. Tati Gabrielle (Kaleidoscope, Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, Uncharted) as Kai Li Cain, Christopher Gorham (The Lincoln Lawyer, Insatiable) as Oliver Queen, David Dastmalchian (Dune, Suicide Squad, Ant-Man) as Grendon, producer/co-director Sam Liu (The Death and the Return of Superman), co-director Christopher Berkeley (Young Justice) and screenwriter Jase Ricci (Teen Titans Go! and DC Super Hero Girls: Mayhem Across the Multiverse).
Both films will have encore screenings in the Arena on Sunday, March 26. Justice League x RWBY: Super Heroes & Huntsmen, Part One will screen at 12:15pm, followed by Batman: The Doom That Came To Gotham at 2:00pm
No Question Mark Box Here; Super Mario Delivers a 1-Up in Theaters
Warner Bros. Discovery Home Entertainment returns to WonderCon 2023
Marvel Studios’ Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3
Crunnchyroll presents ‘BOFURI: I don’t want to get hurt so I’ll max out my defense’: You’re not twinking!
‘Knock at the Cabin’: Puttin on your boogie shoes!
No Question Mark Box Here; Super Mario Delivers a 1-Up in Theaters
Marvel Studios’ Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3
Black Panther: Wakanda Forever
An Askewed View Episode 7 Jay And Silent Bob Reboot
