Bad summer blockbusters are back with a prehistoric vengeance! Most of the Horror community, every last person who loved all the Sharknado movies, and of course your average legion Jason Statham fan, are all eagerly awaiting to be devoured whole by The Meg!
So right away we learn Statham’s character Jonas Taylor has a marked past, when his disastrous decisions as a professional rescue diver left him a broken man some five years previous. But the good folk at Mana One, the most expensive underwater undertaking currently undertaken according to the main investor Morris (Rainn Wilson), need Jonas’ help to rescue some of their people.
There’s a bunch of fun science-y nonsense about hidden underwater layers and never-before-discovered species of aquatic creatures at Mana One, as they penetrate into the deep under-dark, but this innocent little exploratory jaunt is about to get interrupted very abruptly, by an ancient, we’re talking prehistoric y’all, shark on the attack!
Of course getting the original exploratory vessel back allows the ancient Megalodon shark to emerge from the deep dark, which means this mega-monster is now Jaws-ing its way around Chinese coastal waters, and the Mana One station itself. This requires a whole bunch of ill-advised heroism on everyone’s part, often in the best Sharnknado-believability range, so it’s back into the scary depths for us all!
All the choice humanizing interactions between everyone – the precocious Mei-Yun who calls Jonas ‘Crazy’, the somehow charmingly standoffish Ruby Rose as Jaxx, for once the lone ranting black guy DJ actually survived to the end, and of course the burgeoning if strange relationship between Suyin and Jonas – are adorable and heartfelt and we love them, but of course the Meg is the real star of the show. The scenes where it goes chompity-chomp on the rafts in the Chinese bay studded with colorful inner-tubes of tons and tons of tourists, are well done in a fine ‘Jaws’ tribute of shark terrorizing movies, and no one took themselves far too seriously.
You want Jason Statham action-style heroics, prehistoric shark mayhem and all the underwater adventure you can swallow, ‘The Meg’ is absolutely for you. Do yourself a favor and see the movie on the best screen available, them underwater scenes are spectacular.